Buried Poison

When night tickles light,

skeletons rush to shadows,

snakes to flower beds.

 

Stray moonbeams unveil

visions of vague illusions;

Untouchable sights

 

pray on flammable

minds – lurking, misleading till

a sly small spark stirs

 

the eyes to rise. And

blinded by the moment, a

friend becomes a fiend:

 

Honeysuckle’s venom sprays.

Leaves turned thorns, cut naked veins.

Earth turned grey reveals deep grave…

***
Inspiring Natasha Head, invites “…fellow word-bleeders…” to the stage at  d’Verse Poets-Pub i  OpenLinkNight ~ Week 7 ! This is my humble contribution tonight…

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Posted on August 30, 2011, in poem, Poetry and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 16 Comments.

  1. i think it’s one of the saddest things that can happen when a friend becomes a fiend and where once was trust, respect and love is only destruction left…cut naked veins is a strong image for the pain..

  2. Yeah it is an awful action. Had a back stabber once or twice, but let it roll off and that was that. Very strong write.

  3. dang this takes a wicked turn in that last stanza…visible…when betrayed by a friend thosethorns cut so deep and leave such scars…evocative…

  4. friend to fiend is a smart twist – you unfurled a treat here – bitter betrayal by a friend is the worst…you give some back here though. a crafty channel

  5. Flammable minds, I really like that image. Honeysuckle’s venom. That stings. It’s hard when a “Friend” reveals their true self. Luckily the world is packed with lots of real ones just waiting to be met! Like you.

  6. I feel the pain in the poem…the way I felt the pain when this happened to me. You captured it well!

  7. Yes… sad and painful. Hard to get over sometimes.

  8. The first four are haiku poems are they not? Tight write – haunting words.

    These last two lines are gritty and painful images:

    “Leaves turned thorns, cut naked veins.

    Earth turned grey reveals deep grave…”

    Well done ~

    • It’s me trying for the first time to write a haiku… :*) (blush). I looked it up and tried to find “the rules”… I need to dip my feet in different waters. I’d love pointers… 😉 thanx for stopping by and taking note.

      • I’m probably the last person to give pointers on measured verse since I rarely ever write any that conforms to classical rules, so take this for what it’s worth…. I notice that a lot of folks write haiku by counting syllables: 5/7/5. The problem with that is the rhythm is unreliable (some words are more of a mouth-full than other words of the same syllabic length). Personally, I don’t count syllables when I write a haiku. If the rhythm feels good to me I go with that even if, technically, I end up with less than 5 or 7 syllables.

  9. It feels like dawn about to approach in the first stanza, when the ‘danse macabre’ should be coming to an end. But in some kind of backward or gothic cosmos the reverse occurs here and honey turns to poison. As others have said, it’s so bitter to see darkness in the light.

    • Mark, Thank you so much for your pointers. That is exactly what I was having trouble with… you really nailed it! Practice makes perfect? or maybe… it’s just not my thing 😉
      Knowing me… I won’t be satisfied until I try again…
      Thanks again – for your most welcome critique and reflection.
      ~~ deb

  10. Apoem that describes a kind of betrayal – dark. Well done.

  11. nasty situation. Well rendered

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